Friday, December 11, 2015

Being Realistic

Yes I know I haven't gotten on in like a year or so, but that comes with an explanation. Last year I was in 7th grade, which I though would go like every other year of school I did. Straight A student with good attendance and perfect behavior. But something shifted. I had started getting migraines and an attitude. I was missing days upon days of school, while the school work piled up. I did okay first semester, I was a few points off my GPA from getting on honor roll (which was a first for me not to get on honor roll). I was bummed but I was okay. Then second semester happened. I had always had some friction with my teachers in the beginning, but not nearly as bad as second semester. My teacher were bad teachers. I'm not saying that because I didn't like them, they just didn't know how to handle things very well. My social studies teacher, and my science teacher were the only ones I actually liked. Their teaching style wasn't my favorite but I could stand it. But my language arts and math teachers hated me. My language arts teacher got offended I guess you could say when I asked about advanced language arts because I felt bored (they told me I was abstract enough to be in it). She had gotten bitter about it even though it was nothing against her. So I had started feuding a little bit with her. She would say comments like "you have to do your homework to be in advanced language arts" and before standardized MAP testing she would say "you need to go up 23 points to get into advanced language arts". Like thanks for stressing me out (by the way I went up 17).  Though with my math teacher it didn't start in the beginning, but by the end of the year he had quit treating me like a human being. I was just an object in his classroom that was there for 7th period. I didn't exist in his mind. I would sit in the far back corner of the room with my little black journal ignoring him, and him ignoring me. I was a year advanced in math, and surprisingly despite his wishes, I still am. My final grades in 7th grade were: social studies F, science F, math F, and language arts D-. Yes quite the change from a girl with a GPA of a 4.0.
This year is different, I have all As. Just kidding that's far from true. In math I have a B-, science C-, language arts C-, and social studies B+. I didn't make it into advanced language arts this year either, but don't worry I'm doing that same stuff I was doing in 5th grade! Yes if either of my fifth grade teachers are reading this for some reason (specifically Mr.Moore) we are reading Touching Spirit Bear, which I would enjoy if she didn't suck all the life out of the book. I started giving up and going on strike. Based on the comments this year I'm not an idiot, they're legitimately trying to break my spirit. So this semester it was a flop and they won with my broken spirit, but next semester that's not going to happen.
But in my title of this blog post me being realistic, I used to be in a haze of ignorance of the ¨American Dream¨. I realized we don´t all have to be the same. We can do different things in our lives, not the standard of get best paying job you can even if you don´t really love it, get married have two kids work for the rest of your life, retire, and then die. I realize now that I don´t really want any of that. I also realize you don't have to be perfect. I´m trying to be realistic in where I set my goals and expectations of myself, even though many people tell me I´m capable to do more. Yes I probably am, but emotionally that will kill me. 
I made this post mostly so my 5th grade teachers could maybe read it some how, they were the best teachers I've had so far in my schooling career. They seemed to be the only teachers who actually care about their students and seeing them succeed. I want to give props to them, and thank them for being such caring amazing teachers. 

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